Nagi patrol - Son of the Beach [ Cytaty ]

Notch Johnson - Cytaty

Najlepiej oczywiście oglądać sam serial bo tam roi się od pierwszorzędnych textów. Ale dla spragnionych ciętego/dwuznacznego języka mam tu coś. Wszystkie texty po angielsku (nie wiem czy jest sens tłumaczyć) ale z czasem przetłumaczę je. Cytaty nie tylko zachaczają strikte o Notcha ale o wszystkich bohaterów (i dobrze). Wiele z tych kwestii wypowiadają aktorzy którzy grali pojedyncze epizody, to tak dla jasności.

Cytaty

BJ: "Hey! There's Notch chasing an evil asian criminal type on that jetski"
Notch: "We're gonna help those sick kids. When they leave here, they'll still be sick - but they'll be happy!"
Notch: "My unit may not be the biggest, but it's the best"

Chad to BJ: "Er BJ, you know its a tradition to have unprotected sex with your date to Clamapalooza"
BJ: "Oh yes Chad, I'm not worried about that. Its just that, well I'm a virgin".

Dark Horse: "Notch, you mean well, but it is time for the Kahonees to enjoy the fruits."
White Swallow: "Fruits are good, but I really love nuts."

Concerned Father: "I've lost my Peter".
Notch: "Don't worry sir, that's just the cold water, it'll come back soon".
Concerned Father: "But I was just playing with him".
Notch: "That's right sir, that'll help it come back quicker".
Concerned Father: "No, I've lost my son".
Notch: "What? You've lost your peter and your son?"

Labia: "His pinata is huge, like a donkey. Es grande. It's even bigger than grande. It's venti!"

Kimberlee: But Notch, you can get Hawaiian Punch anywhere.
Notch: Yeah, but it's not fresh like it is here.

Notch: When I was young I used to love to suck on the king's nuts

Host: "Notch, you only have to eat one." Notch: "Are you kidding?! These boogers are even better than my own!"

Porcelain: "Tex, remember me?" Tex: "No." Kimberlee: "Show him the top of your head, Porcelain."

B.J.: "Well, no one is gonna penetrate my unit!"

Notch: "You know, when I first proposed devoting an entire building to lavatorial science, many of you pooh-poohed the idea. But a new wind has broken across America--can you smell it? Because now when I look down and see our movement, yes, it seems corny, some of you may find it nutty. But I for one feel flush with hope."

B.J. "I'm afraid to talk. I heard it's painful to be anal-ized." Porcelain: "It hurts at first, but then it feels good if you let yourself relax."

Kimberlee: "I'm sorry. Chappy, you're a therapist?" Chappy: "Kimberlee, I'm definitely certified."

B.J.: "I've never seen so many Cocks."

Chip: "I have a huge beef!"

Jamaica: "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" B.J.: "That my dangling milkbags are about to burst?"

Notch: "Anus, prepare for Johnson!" Henious Anus: "Go ahead, make my gay!"

Chip: "...I don't want you to turn me into Frankenstein! I don't want to be ANY kind of Stein!"

Heinous Anus: "Just relax. You're going to feel a little prick in your throat."

Chip: "What's going on here? I don't think I like it here! I want to go home! Not homo!"

Stink Finger: "You're a very lucky fellow, Mr...?" Notch: "Stain. Peter Stain."

Notch: "Gang, I want you to say hello to F." Porcelain: "Who the f is F?"

Kimberlee: "If you're her [Jamaica's] mother, who's her father?" Okra Lee Gifford: "Honey, I'm savin' that one for sweeps!"

F: "I'll let the queen know of your good work." Notch: "Elton John?" F: "No, George Michael."

Notch: "F you...old dog! I haven't see you since we stopped that plot against the queen!" F: "Yes. And Elton John thanks you. But enough of this gay banter."

Chip: "Kimberlee is now one of them! She sucks the life out of people!!" Notch: "Kimberlee's a divorce lawyer?"

Chip: "Chief! Chief! A body has been found by the dock!" Notch: What a lucky break! Was the doc able to save him?"

Notch: "Porcelain, did you know that Noccus and I fought together in the Three Day War?" Jamaica: "I thought it was the Six Day War." Noccus: "Well it was, but I was able to get 50% off."

Chip: "And now, I'll pull out my really big tool."

Noccus: "Let's just say she went down for the Count."

Notch: "It's over, Fellachio! Nobody whacks this Johnson!"

Vinnei: "After you make the hit, you're a made woman." Jamaica: "I'll make the hit, but I ain't nobody's maid."

Porcelain: "Mrs. Strawther! I didn't know! I swear on my lifelike breasts!"

Notch: "You see, I have a pornographic memory!"

Jamaica: "Vinnie, this place is the bomb!" Vinnie: "WHERE?" Jamaica: "No, um, that's ebonics for bellisima."

Professor Taykakaka: "You have free range, chicken!"

Notch: "Professor! You've got the biggest cock I've ever seen!"

Binaka (in out-of-sync voice): "I'm sorry. I am crying because my father feels I have dishonored him by working in the chicken business." Notch (Also out-of sync): "He does not like to see chicks get eaten?"

Porcelain: "All us big actors love Japan. We can do commercials there without hurting our American careers." Kimberlee: "American career? Oh, I didn't realize picking dollars up without you hands was a career." (snickers) Porcelain: "At least my crotch has seen daylight within the last ten years." (snickers sarcastically)

BJ: "Is it a boy or a girl?" Notch: "BJ, I'm not a doctor."

Notch (after talking to the President): "Well, ya gotta love Bush!" Ellen: "I know I do."

B.J. (to Notch): "Stay away from me! You're a convicted feline!"

Porcelain: "I don't wanna become some kind of a bag lady!" Chappy: "Pity. You sure got the bags for it."

Notch: "You gotta help me, I need a place to hide, Aunt Jizzy." Aunt Jizzy: "Notch, you can hide behind my back porch. It's plenty big."

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